child prodigy

so i was rummaging around the child artwork drawer last night as a result of extreme boredom and i found lots of evidence that i was in fact a child pro

digy. not surprising, i'm aware. the first thing i found was a list written by an anonymous member of the burns children entitled "my promises". it reads as follows:

1. clean the yard when dad moes
2. get the paper on sunday
3. help with shopping bags
4. help plant seeds (?)
5. make your lunch (whose lunch???)
6. LOVE YOU (this part is surrounded by hearts)

good promises, all legitimate i suppose. i also found a stockpile of letters to santa, the tooth fairy, and the easter bunny. quinn's letters to the tooth fairy are always the most entertaining. for example, i found this one:

"dear tooth fairy,
can i have two dollars this is my nineth (nine-eth...awesome) tooth.
love,
quinn.
p.s.
give megan in the crib a qurtar"

how generous of her, assuming that 'qurtar' is supposed to indicate 'quarter'. i also found a santa response letter to one of mine that must have been every parent's worst nightmare, because i guess i posed some difficult questions such as, how does santa get in our house, why is rudolph's nose so red, why do reindeer fly, etc. my favorite is the response to the 'why is rudolph's nose so red' question:

"rudolph's nose is just glowy! even i don't know why. he's just a special guy."

evasive. i like it. i also found a list generated by my kindergarten class on mother's day stating all the reasons we loved our mothers. my only reasons listed were that, "she helped me find a shark's tooth and she goes with me to burger king." cool. i'm glad our relationship has such strong foundations. the other great thing i found was a really old valentines card made by my dad when he was little. it says:

"happy velientines (alien valentine's?) day
dear mother and dad i love you. this is from mike. (insert drawing of a heart-shaped cowboy standing on a fire engine and carrying an ambulance with a heart in the middle in his right hand.) this is the story of the milk man. (two more fire engine drawings now)one day the milk man came and my dog bit him and the milk man went into the house. he told my father on my dog. (insert drawing of a heart w/ an arrow through it)"

so apparently the moral of that story (which also proves that child prodigy-ism runs in the family), was that tattle tales suck and will grow up to be milk men. the end.

children are so smart that they seem dumb by adult standards. oh ps, here is a picture of the contract quinn made me sign at the age of 5 to make me promise we'd be sisters AND best friends for life. very official.