5.01.2010

this is so spot on...

Random thoughts from people in their 20’s (i especially agree with number 22):

1. I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.

2. How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet? (Is there anyone out there who can do this successfully? I damn well can’t!)

3. I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.

4. Do you remember when you were a kid; playing Nintendo and it wouldn’t work? You take the cartridge out, blow in it and that would magically fix the problem. Every kid in America did that, but how did we all know how to fix the problem? There was no internet or message boards or FAQ’s. We just figured it out. Today’s kids are soft.

5. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you’ve made up your mind that you just aren’t doing anything productive for the rest of the day.

6. Have you ever been walking down the street and realized that you’re going in the complete opposite direction of where you are supposed to be going? But instead of just turning a 180 and walking back in the direction from which you came, you have to first do something like check your watch or phone or make a grand arm gesture and mutter to yourself to ensure that no one in the surrounding area thinks you’re crazy by randomly switching directions on the sidewalk.

7. Why is a school zone 20mph? That seems like the optimal cruising speed for paedophiles…

8. I think part of a best friend’s job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.

9. More often than not, when someone is telling me a story all I can think about is that I can’t wait for them to finish so that I can tell my own story that’s not only better, but also more directly involves me.

10. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you’re wrong.

11. There is a great need for sarcasm font.

12. “Do not machine wash or tumble dry” means I will never wash this ever.

13. Sometimes, I’ll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and suddenly realize I had no idea what the f was going on when I first saw it

14. I think everyone has a movie that they love so much, it actually becomes stressful to watch it with other people. I’ll end up wasting 90 minutes shiftily glancing around to confirm that everyone’s laughing at the right parts, then making sure I laugh just a little bit harder (and a millisecond earlier) to prove that I’m still the only one who really, really gets it.

15. How many times is it appropriate to say “What?” before you just nod and smile because you still didn’t hear what they said?

16. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars teams up to prevent a dick from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers!

17. What would happen if I hired two private investigators to follow each other?

18. Shirts get dirty.. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.

19. I can’t remember the last time I wasn’t at least kind of tired.

20. I’m always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten page research paper that I swear I did not make any changes to.

21. I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello? Dammit!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voicemail. What’d you do after I didn’t answer? Drop the phone and run away?

22. As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.

23. Sometimes I’ll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.

24. I keep some people’s phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.

25. I wonder if cops ever get pissed off at the fact that everyone they drive behind obeys the speed limit.

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