god, save the queen some full english breakfast

oh the weather outside is effing delightful

i cannot get over how amazing the weather is here. in fact, i wish it would get COLDER than it already is. warm weather is terrible on a number of levels. it makes you sluggish and it tricks you into believing things that aren't even real. cold weather makes the leaves and the illusions fall off the trees and then you can do anything.

anthem du jour

d.r.u.g.s-the raveonettes

i think i have a phobia of new years eve

latin american christmas time and things

this is pretty much what christmas feels like where i am. it kind of looks like the charlie brown christmas tree lot minus the snow, too:

donde esta santa claus-toni stante


blanca navidad-eydie gorme y el trio los panchos


el cha cha cha de la navidad-celia cruz

anthem du jour

soft denial-millionyoung

12:16: pensamientos and things like that.

i really am glad to know that i lead an alternate existence unbeknownst to me in someone else's daydreams. how amazing to think that i'm having adventures or misadventures all the time, even when i'm asleep. maybe that's what they mean when they talk about alternate universes. maybe everything we imagine becomes a reality someplace else. or maybe it's like telling someone what you wished for after you've wished it; it'll never come true. maybe somebody imagined i'd be an astronaut and that's why i'll never be one. speaking of which, i'm going to wish for the worst possible thing ever to happen to me when i'm blowing out my birthday candles this year. like a shark attack or a haunted house or for ke$ha to be my best friend. then i'll tell all of you and it'll NEVER come true. beating the system, that's what that's called.

beatz and bleepz: the almost real life edition

gahhhhhhhhh i go home to regular america in roughly a week. what a bummer. although today when i had to run errands and was sweating to the point that small children were running around me in their swimsuits like i was some sort of mobile sprinkler system, i realized that maybe going back to subzero temperatures won't be such a terrible thing. especially since january is going to be even worse here temperature-wise. ps the sprinkler thing with the children didn't actually happen, but an old chinese man did judge me at the supermarket. roughly the same thing.

speaking of old chinese men, i've been thinking a lot about what i should do with my life once i leave this place. the logical conclusion that i reached was that i should become an apprentice to some old man, preferably an asian one who lives on a mountain top, to learn a dying art like how to make noodles by hand by bouncing around on a giant wooden pole (i saw this on 'no reservations') or how to do other cool stuff that is being made obsolete by technological developments. because the way this place (also known as planet earth) is going, we're all pretty screwed in terms of our reliance on technological advances. and i think the best investment would be to learn something that no one else knows how to do without the help of technology so that i end up becoming an invaluable asset to the survival of human civilization when we one day blow ourselves up or aliens take over or a giant tsunami floods everything. i mean, it's genius, right? and if no catastrophes happen that increase the value of my future skill(s), i will refuse to teach future apprentice hopefuls. instead, i will sit on the secrets i've learned until the day i die (when i'm like, 300 years old) so that my life will become a million times more significant. because let's face it, i have to go out with some sort of bang since my ideal funeral, aka evita's funeral, is probably not going to happen. god i am so smart it hurts. but anyway, for now i'll stick with what i know and give you your weekly dose of electro:

capital-christoph andersson
the calling-black van
the earth plates are shifting-young empires
i want you (so bad)-clive tanaka y su orquesta
feed me-grand theft ecstasy
all night-oliver

casey weldon: bill murray vs wes anderson

i don't wanna go back there, don't make me!

my time in buenos aires is coming to a close (for now, anyway...) and i decided to come up with a list of reasons why that could be a good thing (for now, anyway...) so that i can fool myself into thinking that it's not so bad to go back to corporate america. here's all i have so far:

• the weather: it's becoming unbearably hot here...i can't survive in summery temperatures and am much happier in fifteen degree weather. that way i can wear all of my favourite things like coats and sweaters and boots and black.
• the food: okay, there are definitely some good things about argentine food, and there are of course other options apart from the pizzas, pastas, steaks and empanadas if you tire of them (which i do), but for the most part this place is severely lacking in the ethnic food department. which means all kinds of terrible things for me, not to mention slows my hangover recovery time by about fifty percent. when i get home i will eat falafels and pho and gai pad med mamuang himapan and all things that are good.
  
• bailey: because the cat sucks and bailey is the most awesome animal on the planet (except for maybe like a narwhal or one of those mini hedgehogs) and i would like to dress her up and feed her things i'm not supposed to feed her like quesadillas or goldfish crackers.
  

yeah, that's about all i could come up with. eff emm ell.

anthem du jour

july first-john dahlback

anthem du jour

for the best-mesita

beatz and bleepz

insert introduction here. TOO TIRED AND FULL OF STEAK. here you go:

invaders-drive pilot
household goods-totally enormous extinct dinosaurs
away-now in stereo
if you return-maximum balloon/yukimi little dragon
morning light-mitzi
kairo-john dahlback
by your side-s.p.y

shut. up. you. god. damn. birds.

birds are super annoying. they're chirping up a storm as we speak and i just want to say, "shut up, sir." but i do not speak bird. fibertel feels my pain:



basic translation:

girl: hey! bird...hey!!
bird: yeah?
girl: how's about you let me sleep?
bird: but it's not time to sleep!
girl: look, i just got back from dancing and i got up early all week.
bird: ok. (continues chirping)
girl: seriously, please, i'm asking you to cut it out. ok?
bird: yeah i get it. i'm leaving.

YOU CAN DO WHAAAAAA YOU WANT

The Suzan "Home" from Mr Goldbar on Vimeo.

awkward japanese magazine pages

<-- watermelon? attitude?












<-- sadness? lethargy?



<-- lack of focus?













<-- insect people?

anthem du jour

i've blogged about 'sunshine lover' by small about a million times now, but i just never get sick of it. asi que here it is:

anthem du jour

endless summer-still corners (appropriate on a number of levels. it seriously is an endless summer.)

things you should buy for fun people

do you like fun people? do fun people like you? well, even if you said no to the second of those questions, fun people will like you if you buy them these awesome gift packages that i have taken the time to compile JUST FOR YOU AND THE AMERICAN ECONOMY. (almost) all under $100, mind you! perfect for the holidays or any occasion where you want to buy friendship. observe:

option #1: marshmallow fun times package. includes:

• stay puft caffeinated marshmallows, $19.99: because they're awesome and they have caffeine in them.
• marshmallow blaster gun, $20: it is my lifelong dream to sit in front of the tv shooting villains like giatta de laurentiis and tyra banks, and i bet it's a lot of other people's lifelong dream too. so buy them a set of two so they can have fun times with the people they love, shooting the shit out of the television screen.
• rice krispies treats cereal, 4 pack, $12.52: this will go nicely with the marshmallow gun activity, because nothing goes better with tv than sitting on the floor eating the best marshmallow and rice-based cereal known to man.
• AND/OR straight up cereal marshmallows, $10.99: because who the eff wants to deal with the other bits in lucky charms? not me, sir. not me. save a loved one loads of fun time which ordinarily would be wasted separating the good from the bad.

option #2: the 'stache bash package. includes:

• set of self-adhesive mustaches, $10: because no 'stache bash would be complete without the mustaches. also makes a nice gift for the less testostastic man friends.
• AND/OR set of mood mustaches, $10: have you ever had difficulty discerning someone's mood because of their lack of coloured facial hair? me too. don't be a victim; instead, give these puppies to your mood swinging friends and you'll never have to guess again.
  
• car stache, $40: not all of us feel like driving pick-up's, but that doesn't mean we have to sacrifice the dignity of our decidedly male automobiles. slap this giant stache on the hood of your car and people will know that neither you nor your vehicle is to be effed with.
• mustache socks, $7.50: treat your loved one's feet to optimal warmth this holiday season with mustache-patterned socks.
• dual mustache beer opener and corkscrew, $14: because nothing goes better with drinking than mustaches.

option #3: dinomite fun package. includes:

• dinosaur "wish you were here" tee, $78: because i do wish they were here. you know, if they were wearing sunglasses and looked like they were down for not being all carnivorous and whatnot.
• foam dinosaur masks, set of 12, $8.95: prehistoric pretend times are the best kind of pretend times.
• inflatable dinosaurs, set of 6, $16.70: the size of a small child, these little guys will keep you company much better than a small child ever could. you can give them names and personality traits for hours of fun in lonely times.
• dinosaur tattoos, set of 72, $6.28: for anyone who has always wanted a tattoo that depicts the rise and fall of the dinosaurs in chronological order, this gift will finally allow that dream to come true via removable tattoos. good for anyone planning to enter the professional world excluding jobs pertaining to paleontology; if they're going for the latter, then go for the gold and get the real thing.
  

option 4: nineties nostalgia package. includes:

• nickelodeon dvd extravaganza, $33.47: there is not one person who would not want this as a gift. or if there is, i don't want to know him. includes dvd packs of the adventures of pete & pete seasons 1 and 2, and clarissa explains it all season 1. if you're feeling generous, throw in doug season 1 for an additional $28.99.
• party mania, $44.95: sure forty-five bones may seem a little steep for a game, but it's not just ANY game, it's THE BEST game of all time. with an interactive vhs companion tape, you'll have a total blast trying not to get stuck with the creepy pervo science geeks. instead, you'll collect tokens to score a date with the two hotties who will probably roofie you at the party. ps i used to cry when i lost this game. actually, i used to cry when i lost most games.
• let's paint the 90's, $9.71: YES, LET'S. full of nostalgic scenes including the tonya harding vs nancy kerrigan dynasty-on-ice disaster. WIN.

so there you have it. if you don't take my advice and instead opt for the scented candles or the "thoughtful" picture frame which contains a photo of your friendship, don't come crying to me when things go downhill.

stuff i want for christmas and that

("and that" equals my birthday, january 9th...)

1. this contact sheet
2. this compass ring
3. these socks
4. a melodica
5. this coat
6. this russian talking watch
7. this thing that makes donuts
8. this poker visor
9. this uv toothbrush cleaner
10. this urawaza book

anthem du jour

tip of your tongue-porcelain raft

relaxing voices installment 3: elliott's mom

do you believe? i do i do i do.

beatz and bleepz

well my friends, it is officially the weekend. i've come to realize that weekends don't really matter so much here to me anymore...every day here is like a finde in itself. so why am i leaving to go back to the united states again? (rhetorical question) but anyway, here are some tunes for those of you working the 9-5:

get in the cart, pig-deadmau5
twilight galaxy (death to the throne rmx)-metric
einmal in der woche schreien-siriusmo
heart is strange (active child rmx)-school of broken bells
empire-sub antix
sun (andy's ill refix)-caribou
matrix of life-allan guevara
love will guide you (robotaki rmx)-shinichi osawa
shuriken-madeon

anthem du jour

for whatever reason, 'lover of mine' by beach house has been stuck in my head for the last twelve hours or so. i don't plan to turn off the repeat button anytime soon, so here you go: