fictional brunch conversations or something.

me: were the eggs procured organically from cage-free golden geese?
waiter: no.
me: were they originally used to conduct a series of critically important gravity tests in outer space and now, upon successful reentry into the earth's atmosphere, have found a renewed sense of purpose in becoming my breakfast?
waiter: no.
me: are they endorsed by malachy, the champion pekingese?
waiter: no.
me: will i gain superpowers if i consume them?
waiter: no.
me: are they cadbury eggs?
waiter: no.
me: is the chef going to cook them using any special and/or magical techniques, including but not limited to telekinesis, laser beams or something cool like that?
waiter: no.
me: so like...okay. why are they $16, then?
waiter: because.
me: oh, okay. that's fair.
waiter: so are you ready to order now?
me: yes! i will have the water, please!